Cosplay as Humans (EridanXReader)
by Pen of Rage
Summary: You were always big on cosplay but these guys that your friends brought over are crazy good at it! It really looked like they had horns and you would have to ask how they got their skin that awesome gray color! Rated M for the final lemon chapter. EridanXReader Eridan X Reader
1. Face Paint

"…" You just stood there, having opened the door to reveal your 'studio' in shambles. It was a complete disaster. Cosplay makeup and contacts were everywhere. Of course it wasn't really a studio it was a flat. But it did have a fantastic view of the building next to you—or more specifically its brick wall.  
"No, Dave! We have to put the makeup on first so it'll have time to dry!" The first one you noticed had short black hair that seemed to stick up in a few places, square glasses, and bright blue eyes. Egbert. You should have known that this was one of his idiotic pranks. He was leaning over an unfamiliar guy who was a little shorter than he was.  
"GET OFF ME FUCKASS!" Egbert had actually used enough gray stage makeup to cover his skin. What an idiot. Did he have any idea how much that shit cost? And now he was actually trying to cover the gray makeup with a light skin tone. You had no idea what they used to make those cute little nubby horns in his black hair, but you'd have to ask after you beat the crap out of John. You caught a glimpse of his completely yellow eyes. Oh no fucking way they used your contacts! Those were like sixty bucks a shot!  
"Hey (Name). How's it going?" The familiar guy with round sunglasses was the first to take notice of your presence. Strider. Figures. Wherever side-kick John Egbert is, Dave would be there too.  
"I locked the door." You stated, not a response to his question at all.  
"Striders don't need keys." The corner of Dave's lips twitched—as close to a smile as Striders ever got.  
"(Name)!" John jumped off the guy and gave his derpy grin. "Beep Beep Meow needs help."  
"DON'T CALL ME THAT NOOKSUCKER!" The one in cosplay said, only causing John to increase the size of his grin. "HOW IS THIS STUPID HUMAN SUPPOSED TO HELP? ALL THIS SHIT IS SHITTY!" It became clear to you that he liked to yell.  
"Wwhat are you codsuckin' doin' in here?" Your attention turned to the newest voice and you blinked. He had a stripe of purple in his black hair and two thunder-bolt like horns on each side of his head. He had been painted gray as well? Wow. They even went into the detail of using latex foam and sculpting on small fin-like appendages to his cheek bones.  
"Holy crap." You stated. As a lover of cosplay and costumes in general you had to get a better look at this.  
"Wwhat in c-cod's name are you doin'? Don't—" You couldn't help yourself and touched one of the fins. Oh my gosh! It was warm to the touch and felt almost like skin but with a bit of roughness; almost like scales. Even more amazing was the fact that his face lit up with a purple blush.  
"How the hell did you guys do this!?" You exclaimed, eyes practically sparkling with amazement as you touched where it should have a seam against the skin. They even covered that with liquid latex? They usually sucked at make up! …They sucked at make up? THEY SUCKED AT MAKEUP! Your head snapped to John and Dave as you quickly pulled your hand back.  
"If you wwant to fill a quadrant wwith me all you need to do is ask. I'm shore wwe can wwork out wwhich one you wwanna be in."  
"John you've got one word to explain exactly what the fuck is happening." You turned towards him, patience gone. John gave you a dopey smile, slapping the shorter troll with a handful of skin-tone cream based makeup.  
"Aliens."

"Egbert if this is another prank, I swear to god. I swear to god, Egbert!" You threatened as he tried to forcibly merge the alien's skin with the cream base. It's like he wasn't even trying to spread it evenly. He had taken a huge glob, which amounted to about half the container, and shoved it onto his face. Now that it was on he seemed to be trying to push it into his skin.

"STOP IT FUCKASS!" The loud one yelled. "IT'S NOT DRYING! YOU'RE JUST SMEARING THE SHI—" The lump of makeup slipped from John's hand directly into the smaller alien's mouth. Almost instantly he started flipping out, trying to spit the mush-like substance. You could relate. While you had cosplayed for nearly two years, when you first started you made the same mistake of using cream for the whole thing. Some had gotten into your mouth and as you watched him struggle with it the taste of chemicals drifted back to your own taste buds. "EGBERT YOU ASSHAT!"  
"So… you're dressing them like humans?" You questioned, raising an eyebrow.  
"Yeah." Dave said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "You've seen ET. Government and aliens aren't cool with each other."  
"Oh right, how silly of me to not base my opinions of a movie made in 1982." Your voice was laced with sarcasm. "How'd you get them here? A trail of Reeses Pieces?" Another twitch from Dave while John laughed.  
"No!" John informed you. "Karkat hates peanut butter so we used Skittles." You paused, trying to form some coherent thought in your mind. How did John function?  
"I DON'T HATE PEANUT BUTTER! I JUST HATE IT WHEN YOU TRY TO SHOVE IT IN MY FACE LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT! I CANNOT BE LED TO A PLACE BY LEAVING A FUCKING TRAIL OF CANDY ON THE GROUND!"  
"You ate the Skittles, dude. You can't argue." Dave shook his head. You turned back to the other alien. He was wearing a pair of blue and black stripped pants, a long sleeve black shirt with a purple Aquarius symbol on it, hipster glasses, a light and dark blue scarf, and he was wearing a purple cape.  
"So let's so for one brief moment in a total and complete lapse of judgment on my part, that I believe you." You held up your hands. "What is it that you want from me? To do makeup?"  
"Yeah." John grinned happily. "But don't worry we'll do Beepbeepmeow!" You half smirked at this.  
"Of course you will John. I didn't think Dave would be into that kind of thing though."  
"I am not a homosexual!" John slapped Karkat with even more face paint, leaving a large glob of it sticking to the side of his face. You nearly burst into laughter. John was simply applying more and more to the same side. It looked like Karkat had a tumor on the side of his face. It seemed to be weighing down his head slightly, causing him to permanently tilt his head.  
"So… indulge me for a moment." You looked at the Aquarius then back to both John and Dave. "What exactly were you two planning on doing about the horns?"  
"Dave said we could cut them."  
"The fuck!?" You snapped, looking at Karkat. "Is that what happened to his hor—"  
"THEY DIDN'T CUT MY HORNS FUCKASS! THEY'VE ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THIS!" Apparently you hit a sensitive issue.  
"Jeeze sorry." You commented, turning back to the one who hadn't screamed at you. "So you wanna come with me before these idiots try to cut off your horns?"  
"Wwell I suppose it's better than the alternativve, though I don't reely havve a choice." He followed you away from the horrifying display that was Dave, John, and Karkat. The Aquarius seemed hesitant when you opened the door to your room, simply standing outside it as you walked in. "Look I knoww that I'm hot an' everyfin' but don't you think that wwe should get to knoww each other a bit before—"  
"Whoa." You held up your hands to him. "Ignoring the fact you think I wanna fuck you, which let me assure you is not the case, I'm only taking you in here because I need the good makeup not that shit they're randomly slapping on your sap of a friend. Now kindly shut up before I really do turn you into the government."  
"So… Kismesis then?"


	2. Making WWavves

"Just hold still!" You sighed angrily at the alien in front of you. Currently you were trying to mold his fins to his face because there was no way you could cover them if they just stuck out. You would have to force them to mold down then use latex and foam rubber to shape them out. The harpoon-gun was leaning against your door which was probably a good thing because that meant he didn't have it aimed at you.  
"Stop touchin' my fins landwweller!" He made an attempt to slap your hand away.  
"Look dude, if you don't—"  
"Eridan."  
"What?"  
"I don't knoww wwhat those other landwwellers told you but my name is Eridan not dude."  
"Whatever, Eridan." You put stress on his name, dragging it out slightly. You didn't catch the dark purple blush on his cheeks. "Can you please hold still? This will go a lot quicker and hopefully I can save Karkat before those idiots feed him enough makeup to kill him." Once again when you tried to touch his fins he pulled away. He was like a child and honestly it was pissing you off a bit but then you noticed something. He looked scared. "Look, I'm not gonna hurt you. Alright?" He didn't say a word but this time he didn't resist when you touched his fins. Slowly, assuming it was painful to mess with them, you lightly brushed them back with liquid latex. "Does that hurt? Or does it feel comfortable enough you could live with it for a while?"  
"Just a wwhile." He sounded pained.  
"Sorry. How about like this? Better?"  
"T-That's better I guess." You tried to touch them as soft as possible, but it only seemed to be making him twitch and squirm more. You left that one alone and moved to the next. "Cod!"  
"Sorry!" You exclaimed again, releasing the lenient grip on him his facial appendage. "Fuck, I didn't realize this would hurt you so much."  
"Wwhat?"  
"Sorry didn't mean to curse. Again. Here, let me see if I can't—" You softly gripped one of his horns, attempting to see if it was moveable or bendable in any way. Much to your dismay it appeared to be completely solid. How the hell were you going to hide those?  
"Movve your hands."  
"Oh snap, sorry. I—" You began to pull away only to have him catch you by the wrist and shake his head.  
"No. Movve them on my horns." He got a spark in his eye, of course you didn't see it. "It makes my fins hurt less wwhen you touch them." He seemed to be telling the truth as you softly stroked his horns his eyes closed slightly. "You knoww, you could probably finish my fins wwhile you rub my horns. Since it takes awway the pain."  
"Are you sure?" His eyes opened, connecting with yours and causing him to blink. You looked guilty for hurting him and small tears pricked in your eyes. You may talk a big game but you really didn't like seeing anyone hurting.  
"Wwhat's wwrong? Wwhy are you—"  
"I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to hurt you." You shook your head, the small tears falling. "You came to me for help and I… I'm sorry…" He reached up, holding your hand still.  
"Cod. Don't cry an' wwhatevver." He brought your hand back down. "It doesn't hurt anymore an' I can put on the latex stuff if you wwant. I knoww howw to touch them so they wwon't… hurt." He wasn't looking at you anymore.  
"Alright. I'll get th-the other makeup." You wiped the tears from your eyes as your voice cracked and forced a smile at Eridan, who took the bottle of latex from you. Before you walked away to get the makeup you hugged Eridan softly. At first he just stood there then, slowly, he returned the light hug. "I'm really sorry I hurt you Eridan." You had no way of knowing but at that moment, when you whispered to him, Eridan felt like the biggest douchebag in the universe. The biggest douchebag in the universe with a hard bonebuldge at least.

You chuckled a bit as you put the paint on Eridan's face. He was obviously expecting it to be clumpy and oily like the shit they smeared on Karkat. Nope. God you loved stage makeup.  
"Oh my gosh! I have just the thing for this look!" You exclaimed excitedly as a huge smile spread on your face. You took off into your closet, throwing random pieces of cosplay everywhere. Then you found it. "Here, try this on." You had made it so his hair covered most of his horns and surprisingly he looked kind of badass. The item you handed him was a beanie that matched his scarf perfectly by color and strips.  
"Wwhy do I havve to wwear this?" He looked at it like it was full of lice—which it wasn't.  
"To cover your horns." You informed him. "People don't have horns and it will be a dead giveaway if you show yours. Besides it'll look totally bass." He raised an eyebrow at this.  
"Bass?"  
"You know, badass." You couldn't help but laugh a bit at his face. "Oh come on, I tried to make a fish pun, I should get credit for the attempt. If you can think of a better fish pun, let minnow." You could swear that you saw a small smile on his face as he shook his head, putting on the hat.  
"Fine." He put the hat on and you stepped back to check over your work. Damn. He looked like a right respectable hot dude. Hot? No no no. Okay a little. Only a little. Halibut. He looked hot. Not quite as hot as he did without the makeup though. Crap he's looking at you! Say something.  
"Okay you're good." Now all you had to do was keep it up and not say anything stupid. "Alright let's—" **SMACK!** Perhaps you should have focused on not _doing_ stupid things because as soon as you turned to walk out and see how Karkat was holding up you ran into your door. Yup smooth.  
"Are you hurt?"  
"No." You grumbled, rubbing your face. "Just my pride."  
"You better let me sea." You couldn't argue with fish puns and turned to him, only to have him softly grip you by the chin. You blinked as he got about an inch from your face, looking in your eyes.  
"Uh…"  
"Does this hurt?" He questioned before pushing his lips onto yours. Okay now was a good time to freak out… his lips were soft. You wrapped an arm around the back of his neck, deepening the kiss. His tongue flicked across your lips, asking for permission. With a small smile you opened your mouth and his wet appendage slipped inside. A battle of dominance ensued with you quickly surrendered. After nearly two minutes of furious making out, you pulled back gasping for air.  
"No."  
"O-Oh. Wwell, I understand if—"  
"No, it didn't hurt." You shook your head with a small giggle. He gave you a cocky smile at this, a plan to turn that giggle into a moan in the near future. You opened the door and walked out, still not fully believing what had just happened. A crash rang through the house as Karkat hit the ground, trying to crawl away across the floor as John held onto his legs, makeup in hand.  
"GET OFF OF ME FUCKASS!"  
"John, let go of him." You shook your head.  
"ABOUT TIME ASSHAT! WHAT TOOK YOU SO-…" He stopped yelling, looking at Eridan for a moment. "Well fuck. Maybe you're not so useless after all."  
"Gee, thanks." You said sarcastically. Karkat raised an eyebrow.  
"Doesn't that bother you when you move your head? I thought that fins were—" Eridan clamped a hand over Karkat's mouth.  
"Kar, I need to talk to you in the other room for a glubbin' second." With that Eridan pulled Karkat into the kitchen and left you, Dave, and John just standing there.  
"What was that about?" Dave asked.  
"Oh!" John turned to you. "You didn't touch his horns did you?"  
"Oh my god, why!?" You exclaimed, trying to sound more annoyed than panicked. Were you going to contract some kind of weird alien disease?  
"They're sensitive!" John informed you with a whispered voice.  
"…Yeah I gathered that. Touching them calmed him down after I hurt his fins."  
"Hurt his fins?" Dave raised an eyebrow and the corners of his lips twitched. He had always thought of you as somewhat of a cool chick after you gave him a pair of colored contacts that were records to match his shirt.  
"(Naaaaaame)." John looked at you with whiney eyes to match his voice. "Sensitive!" Light bulb. Oh fuck. This scampi happening. It was ofishal he was gonna pay. No clowning around. You dolphinitely needed to scale back on the fish puns. You couldn't kelp it! You faked a laugh that was so believable even you believed it.  
"Dude of course I didn't touch his horns or his fins. Contact was kept to a minimum." Dave went back to his relaxed cool posture and John shook his head. "What? Mad I finally got you John?" Karkat and Eridan walked out of the kitchen, a look of disgust on Karkat's face. What you were feeling was a mix of hurt, betrayal, and pure dumbassery on your part, but you hid it well.  
"Let's get this shit over with." Karkat growled as you walked with him back to your room.

It had been three weeks and you hadn't seen or heard from Eridan. No real shocker you were actively avoiding him and went to great lengths to do so. You even went as far as to have one of your cosplay friends to do his makeup for you. Currently you were stationed at the one place in this town you could actually think—the cliffs that overlooked the ocean. There was no beach access so unfortunately so all you could do was sit over the edge and look at the crystal water. It surprised you when you heard footsteps and caused you to turn. Instantly you frowned.  
"Wwhere havve you been? I wwas lookin' for—" Eridan. He wasn't even wearing his makeup.  
"You must think I'm stupid." You commented, turning away from him. "Well I'm not so get the fuck away from me."  
"Wwhat in cod's name are you glubbin' about?" Usually this would have made you giggle at least, instead you just frowned more.  
"Get. The fuck. Away. Unless (friend's name) got makeup in your ears I see no reason you could have misheard me." Yeah you were pretty pissed.  
"I can't go to your glubbin' friend."  
"Why not? Won't fondle your horns?" Realization sunk into his head as you spat the words at him.  
"I don't wwant some squid-suckin' landwweller to touch my horns. I—"  
"Then why the fuck did you trick me into doing it?!" You snapped, spinning around to face him. Tears streaked down your face. "Exactly what did you think was going to happen when you tricked me?"  
"I wwasn't thinkin' that you'd evver wwanna talk to me after you helped me so..."  
"How far were you hoping I was stupid enough to take it?!" Your heart hurt. How could he do that? Did he really think you were that stupid? Where you that stupid? You buried your head in your hands, tears now falling freely as your body shook with rage and sadness. Eridan walked over, sitting a good ten feet from you.  
"I'm sorry. It nevver crossed my think pan that someone like you wwould evver wwanna be my friend. My old Moirail didn't exactly respond to my advvances either."  
"Oh my god!" You snapped at him, pulling your hands away. "You've done this before!? What's wrong with you? Did you trick her into kissing you too!"  
"…" He shook his head. "You wwere… my first." Okay shock. So… he wasn't a player? But he just said that he tried to hit on his old Moirail!  
"But you just said—"  
"Nobody really wwants to be around me. No matter wwhat I screww things up. I had a Kesmessiship but I managed to mess that up to."  
"That must stingray." An attempt at humor to get him out of the dumps. Why would you do that? You wanted him to feel bad.  
"That was terbubble." No you didn't. You didn't want this… jerk-fish-stick to feel bad. You moved the ten feet towards him and sighed, leaning against his shoulder.  
"Hey. If I'm your Moirail I don't have to fondle your horns or fins, right?" He shot you a small smirk.  
"Not unless you wwanna be my Matesprit." You rolled your eyes at the joke.  
"Dude, that's not funny."  
"Eridan. And I wwasn't jokin'."


	3. Beach Fun

You reluctantly walked to the edge of the cliff, biting back your fear. All your fear would end when you hit the bottom so you didn't really know why your legs were shaking. Eridan was there. Did you really want to jump from this cliff? Yes. Yes you did. You took a deep breath, backed up and took off at a run, jumping at the edge of the cliff. What choice did you have? Thankfully swimming and diving were some of the first things that you learned in your relationship with Eridan. You hit the water with a splash, instantly becoming engulfed in ice-like water. It stung your lungs but as soon as you surfaced and the wind hit you, you instantly missed the ice water.

"Sea, that wasn't so bad, wwas it?" In response to the seadweller next to you, you only shivered.

"You're oouttttta your mmmmmmind." You shook, teeth chattering. You were doing everything possible to be warmer, gripping your shoulders while kicking to stay floating.  
"You seem cold."  
"Wwwwwwway to sttttate the obvvvvious." You quivered from the cold water. "Sssssome of us can'tttttt swim with all of our clllothes on." He moved closer as he circled around you easily, in a shark-like pattern.  
"Wwould it help if I removved my clothing?"

"Ddddddon't evvvvvven thhhink abouttttt itttt." You were a shaking mess by now and two arms entwined your body from behind. His slender swimmer body was pressed up against you so tightly you could feel his abs through the fabric… wait.

"But you seem so cold. I could wwarm you up."

"Errrrrriddddan." You were doing everything possible to stop the chattering of your teeth, unsuccessfully. He did feel warm. You could feel his breath on your neck, contrasting with the nipping of the air.

"Yes?"  
"Did you take off your clothes?"  
"Only the ones I didn't need." You laughed, shaking both you and the water around you. The laugh, however, quickly turned into a moan as Eridan began to nip and suck at your neck. "Wwanna play wwith my fins?" He purred into your neck. Another giggle and you were no longer cold. He definitely had a way of heating up chilly water. As you moved to turn you lost the contact with his arms and chest. Once you were turned facing where he had been all that was there was a ripple in the water. You glanced around the dark water curiously. Where would he surfa—something brushed against your ankle.  
"Eridan that better be you." You warned. "If I get killed by a giant squid or some shit while I'm out here, I'm gonna be so pissed. You don't even know!" Nothing. Okay so you didn't exactly have nerves of steel while you were in an ocean of things that would love to eat you. "E-Eridan?" Jaws came to your mind. You bit your lip and began to swim backwards, closer to the cliffs and away from sharks. You didn't make it as familiar hands held your hips and Eridan rose just in front of you with a smirk. "Eridan! Damn it, don't do that!" He laughed a little at your reaction.

"Wwhy? Think I'm goin' to leavve you?" This hadn't crossed your mind and you blinked blankly at him. Did… he think that way? "I wwon't."  
"Promise?"

"I swwear, I'll nevver leavve you." You beamed brightly at him, arms wrapping around his neck and pulling the two of you closer as your lips met. Almost instantly the kiss became heated and he wanted to taste every inch of your mouth. You squirmed a bit, thinking you were slipping out of his grip and had to stay above water. You successfully and lightly, slid against him. His breath hitched right before a moan escaped into the kiss.

"Can we…" You pulled back, gasping for air. "Can we move this to the beach?" The small beach was completely vacant which was what you expected. The only way to get here was to jump. He smirked at you confidently.  
"Wwhatevver you wwant." He held you tightly around the waist while he pulled you to the shallow water towards the beach. He was still in his swim trunks… for now at least. "Wwhat did you havve in mi—" You crashed your lips onto his again. As much as you loved to hear him talk, you'd rather taste him now. Your friend had once asked you if Eridan tasted like fish. That was a stupid question. The answer was obviously no. You loved the little moans that he gave when you would scrape your nails softly across his horns or play with his fins. "Cod…" He melted in your hands as your hands toyed with his hair and horns while you curiously kissed one of his fins. "(N-Name). Th-that feels so good… But… I can't let you havve all the fun."

"Oof!" You were pushed on your back from your sitting position on the beach, wet sand sticking to your hair. "Eridan, I was—" He attacked your neck as his hands found their way to your beasts. "Eridan…"  
"I don't knoww wwho he wwas…" Eridan whispered while nipping at your neck. "But I'll make sure that you nevver call me by his name again."

"Eridan, who are you—ah!" He was getting a bit rough with your breasts, pinching the nipples through the swim suite before taking the top off completely.

"Dude…" He whispered, trailing licks down your body. "I nevver wwanna hear you say his name again."  
"Dude? It's just—oh god!" You arched your hips up as he moved to licking your inner thigh. You could feel the heat of his mouth so close to you and it was driving you crazy.

"Nevver again."  
"N-Never again." You agreed. You would have to explain to him later who, or rather what dude was. For now, though, you hadn't drunken in nearly enough of his moans. Before he could remove your bathing suite further, you brushed him through his shorts. That noise. That noise is exactly what you wanted to hear.

"(Name)… you havve no idea howw that—haaa!" He took in a gasp as you slipped your hand into the elastic band. You pulled down his trunks to reveal a writhing purple tinted tentacle with a blunt head. It wasn't slimy or anything, thank god, but it did seem to squirm under your touch. It was moving in an attempt to get more attention from your hand. With every contact Eridan was gasping out your name, begging for it. You chuckled a bit and pulled your hand back. "Wwhy… wwhy did you stop?"

"Sorry. I need both hands to take this off." You slipped off your, now mostly dry, bathing suite. His face tinted purple and yours was bright red.

"Are you… are you shore?" You laughed a little at the fish pun, even though you had heard it a hundred times since you had been dating.

"Yes." You pulled up from your back, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him softly as he lined up with you. He began to push in, at first met with slick but tight walls. "Ah!" You were trying not to cry out but adjusting to his size was ino small/i feat.  
"It wwon't hurt for long." He assured you, gently kissing your neck and lips again as he restrained himself.  
"E-Eridan…" You moaned out. "Please… move." He was all too happy to comply, thrusting into you with a slow rhythm at first. The pain faded with ever stroke as his bulge stroked you from the inside, constantly turning and twisting to give you ultimate pleasure.

"So… So tight… So hot…" He groaned. "C-Cod…"

"Faster. Please. Eridan, oh god!" You cried out, holding onto his horns only to receive a growl from the sea dweller. His pace began to speed up, causing you to call out his name as he slammed into a particular spot. He seemed to have been looking for it, because he continually abused that spot. "Jesus! Eridan! Y-Yes! God, please!"

"(N-Name) you're… you're so good…" His breath was becoming ragged as he pushed with everything he had. You were nearing your release and he his. The twisting of his bulge became sporadic with his thrusts.

"Eridan, I, I'm gonna…"  
"I'm close…" Was his response. Another few wild thrusts and you were sent into the land of fireworks that lay just behind your vision with a cry of his name. "(Name)! Oh cod!" As you tightened around him it was no question that he would lose it. "(Name)!" He came with a prayer of your name, filling you with his genetic material. Your body shook at the new sensation as he collapsed next to you. For a while the two of you simply stayed like that, him inside you and embracing you.

"Eridan…"  
"I don't wwant to not feel you just yet, (Name)."  
"Eridan."  
"A little wwhile longer."  
"Eridan!" He looked at you to see amusement written on your face. "Eridan how are we going to get back up the cliff?" His eyes traveled up the scaling cliff before he looked back at you with a coy smirk.

"Wwe could swwim until wwe find another beach… evven though wwe just broke this one in."


End file.
